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Sep
25
2008
| PtF Labs presents: THE PICKSPERIMENT |
| By: Holly | ||||||||||||||||||||
| Thursday, 25 September 2008 | ||||||||||||||||||||
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Episode 4: Ask A Very Small Child If
this first few weeks of bat country football has taught us anything,
aside from reminding us that Brett Favre is just like a kid out there
(look at the unbridled joy on his face as he wings another gamebreaking
interception!), it's that no one, But No One has a lock strategy for
predicting winners. I made it twelve weeks in my survival pool last
year just picking, alternately, teams whose mascots gave me night
terrors as a child and whoever was playing the Falcons. This
season, we're taking a scientific approach. Brady's gone. The Colts
are struggling on offense. Conventional wisdom has sustained a body
blow. So grab your lab coats, campers--each week we'll be examining a
different methodology for ruling the office pool. Our
guest today is my four-year-old cousin Kaylee. We'll be soothsaying
the week's wins and losses through a complicated algorithm of
etymology, teams that have horsies for mascots (she really, really like
horsies), and jerseys that resemble costumes from her new favorite
movie, Star Wars Episode IV. What could go wrong? The rest after the jump .
Cleveland at Cincinnati THE PICK: Cincinnati THE SCIENCE: Tigers look like kitties. Minnesota at Tennessee THE PICK: Minnesota THE SCIENCE: Purple matches the Disney Princess nightgown she has taken to wearing four days in a row over her clothes. Denver at Kansas City THE PICK: Denver THE SCIENCE: Horsies! San Francisco at New Orleans THE PICK: New Orleans THE SCIENCE: An utter inability to pronounce "San Francisco." Arizona at NY Jets THE PICK: Arizona THE SCIENCE: Fear of airplanes. Green Bay at Tampa Bay THE PICK: Green Bay THE SCIENCE: Tampa Bay's logo frightens her nearly to tears. Atlanta at Carolina THE PICK: Carolina THE SCIENCE: "They look like Jedis!" (I'm not seeing it, but she's the expert here.) Houston at Jacksonville THE PICK: Houston THE
SCIENCE: This was a nonverbal pick, but she keeps stabbing her finger
at the star in their logo, so we're rolling with that. San Diego at Oakland THE PICK: San Diego THE
SCIENCE: Another nonverbal pick. We're approaching naptime, clearly.
Every time she looks at the Raiders' official website, she just shakes
her head with disdain. I couldn't be prouder. (San Diego is also a
horsey team; although she has no way of knowing this.) Buffalo at St. Louis THE PICK: Buffalo THE
SCIENCE: At this point, she's refusing to pick, just looking around
the room and shrugging. I'm translating this to the apathy of allowing
a team to be "discreetly" removed to Canada. Washington at Dallas THE PICK: Dallas THE
SCIENCE: And after a brief snack break, we're back and rejuvenated.
Kaylee will not be swayed by my repeated explanations that nothing
about Dallas resembles an actual cowboy. Philadelphia at Chicago THE PICK: Chicago THE SCIENCE: Philly's helmet logo is "looking at me". Baltimore at Pittsburgh THE PICK: Pittsburgh THE SCIENCE: "It's sparkly!" *If it's not patently obvious by now--for entertainment purposes only. If that.
3.26 Copyright (C) 2008 Compojoom.com / Copyright (C) 2007 Alain Georgette / Copyright (C) 2006 Frantisek Hliva. All rights reserved." |
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